Neil Patrick Harris’s 2023 Holiday Gift Guide

This time of year truly is the season of giving. (Remember, it starts with a holiday called “Thanksgiving.” If that’s not foreshadowing, I don’t know what is.) And if you’re like me, you love giving. And receiving. (Oh yes, I did.) After all, opening a present from a loved one is magical. I mean, yeah, sure, everyone loves getting stuff (except the flu), but it also kinda takes you back to being a kid, doesn’t it? Heart racing, wrapping paper flying, Aunt Vicky, her menthol cigarette in hand, yelling at you from the couch, “Save the bows for next year!” (Hey, in the end, she was probably just being sustainable, not a cheapskate. You go, Aunt Vic.) So, that’s why this week — as has been the case for the last two years — I’ve cobbled together my personal wish list for Wondercade: Santa, baby, hurry down the chimney tonight! (Why does Santa prefer entering through the chimney? I don’t know, but it does soot him…)

The reason for sharing this list is twofold. First is, well, because I want this stuff. I’ve been a good boy, Santa-slash-David-slash-friends-slash-family members-slash-other gift-giving philanthropists! But second, and more importantly, my Wondercader…it’s because I want to give you ideas of dope stuff to buy for folks (or put on your own wish lists!). As Cheap Trick once sang, “I want you to want me the holiday gifts that I want.” So that’s Act 1: a heaping helping of holiday inspo, one that’s comin’ at ya just in the St. Nick of time, considering December’s already almost half over… -NPH

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GEAR

Huckberry Exclusive James Brand Elko Pocket Knife

At any given time, my pockets will be holding the following: loose change, house keys, lip balm and a pocket knife. (Makes for quite a strange bulge in sweatpants.) Regarding that item of cutlery, this one from Huckberry is, simply, a cut above. It slices. It dices. It makes no compromises. (Okay, not a perfect rhyme, but eff it.) It’s only 2.5 inches long (poor thing), so it’s easy to carry around all the time, keeping you ready to tackle any situation where you might need to pull a MacGyver.

reMarkable 2 Tablet

Technology is great, but I’m a fan of all things tactile, touchable, tangible. Old-school. OG. Classic. A real pen-to-paper kinda situation. And this tablet is just that. Well, okay, not actually pen and paper…more like stylus and screen. But still. You can use this puppy to jot down notes, doodle, make a to-do list, write a ransom note, a love letter to your loved ones, play hangman alone…the possibilities are endless. But whatever you do, you’ll be helping the environment by cutting down on paper, and can save your writings / drawings / missives as a PDF.

Audio-Technica Turntable

As I was saying, I love old-school vintage things from a bygone era. Um, except bell-bottoms. Save for a Saturday Night Fever cosplay or Brady Bunch group Halloween costume. One thing I do miss about the ‘70s? Record players. I’m so glad they’ve had a resurgence in the last few years. And all that popularity means cool, new, modern versions of traditional turntables. This one is dope: its needle is made of diamond so it’ll last forever, and the belt always runs at constant speed for peak performance. And you can hook it up not only to a retro stereo, but also your computer or Bluetooth speakers.

Meta Quest 3

Immersive experiences are another thing I have a soft spot for. And considering that’s the whole premise of virtual reality, I’m a massive fan of the genre. Of all the VR headsets on the market, Meta Quest is the king. This latest model, the Quest 3, which came out in October, has improved graphics, a smaller and lighter headset and AR as well as VR. If Harry Houdini was the greatest escape artist, consider this apparatus the greatest escapism art. Want.

Home Depot Gift Card

You can never go wrong with a gift card: they give your recipient (or yourself) all the options and freedom in the world to buy whatever they please. (Also, it completely removes the analysis paralysis of picking a gift.) And, like I mentioned at the tippy top of this section, I adore tools and tinkering (why does that word sound so dirty), so if you’re listening, jolly St. Nicholas, the Home Depot is the perfect place to give me carte blanche (or at least however much is on the gift card). Recently, I’ve unleashed my inner Ron Swanson and picked up woodworking as a hobby (and Scotch as a passion; though not while woodworking — safety first), so I’m super excited to see some saws.

HEALTH AND WELLNESS

Tonal

I’ve mentioned Tonal soooo many times in this humble newsletter, and guess what? I’m mentioning it again! Hey. My house, my rules. And by “house,” I mean “newsletter,” but I also mean my actual house, because Tonal brings the gym straight into your home. This thing is seriously the best!! Its adjustable arms can be configured in dozens of different positions, offering you 250 different exercises for your upper, lower and whole body, with up to 200 pounds of resistance. I already have one of these, so it’s kind of cheating putting it on here, but that’s just how much I like it. (See: “My house, my rules.”)

Theragun Elite

Another wellness product I adore is the Theragun, though mine is older and louder than my teenage twins (not literally, but it’s close). That’s why I’ve got my eye (both of them, actually) on this latest version of the popular personal massager. The new Elite model’s got a funky attachment with lots of tiny spikes that stimulates circulation, and app-based customizable controls that guide you, step-by-step, on how to best target and massage muscles for optimal post-workout recovery. Look — New Year’s resolutions at the gym can be painful enough; this gizmo will make them suck (and hurt) a lot less.

Jabra Elite 7 Pro Headphones

I have a pair of over-the-ear noise-canceling headphones that are great for retreating into my personal cozy cocoon of cacophony-kaputting quiet…but have you ever noticed how bulky they are? And space in my one in-flight personal item is limited! (As is shelf space/table real estate to charge my devices, what with those aforementioned teens and all their gizmos.) Well, luckily there’s a fine selection of tiny, noise-canceling earbuds these days, and this particular pair is atop my list. They’re subtle and sleek visually, and silence-summoning aurally. You listening, Santa?

STYLE

Orlebar Brown Bulldog Swim Shorts

Okay, I get it, winter hasn’t even officially started yet, and here I am, already thinking about peelin’ down to my skivvies and floating on a giant inflatable flamingo while sipping a Mai Tai. You think Santa isn’t already thinking about vacation?! Best to start prepping now with a pair of swim trunks from my #1 favorite swimwear brand. They’re cut perfectly and come in tons of patterns — David got me a pair for my birthday and I’ve never looked back. (Except when I’m around a three-way mirror, and can see how good the trunks’ cut looks on my dumptruck.) Plus, they currently have a smashing collab with James Bond, so you can lay out in all your Octopussy glory. Maybe Papa needs a second suit?

Chimi 04 Black Sunglasses

I’m kinda feeling like entering a Buddy Holly era with my eyewear in 2024. These shades from Chimi have an awesome ‘50s look that’d charm even the most casual rockabilly fan. (Bonus: They’re on sale. You’re welcome.)

Saxx Quest Two-Pack Underwear

This little package of undies will do wonders for your package! I’d be elated to find my banana hammock of choice nestled into my stocking. (That’s not me being cheeky, by the way — Saxx’s “BallPark Pouch” is the brand’s best feature in that it showcases your best features.)

Timex Marlin Hand-Wound Watch

Here’s my philosophy on wristwear: a good watch instantly elevates your style, and being a lover of horology (that’s the study of clocks, for you Ken Jennings aspirants out there) shouldn’t break the bank. This dope Timex with a leather strap out of James Bond’s Thunderball era (more 007!) ticks all those boxes. (And maybe tocks them, too.)

Cartier Santos-Dumont Watch

And then there’s the other side of the watch-spending spectrum, with this gorgeous piece landing firmly in “eff the budget” territory. But you get what you pay for: it’s a frickin’ Cartier, and will likely last you, as Chicago once sang, “‘til the end of time.” Which is good, because it’s timeless. Also, is there ever a bad time to treat yourself? I could keep this up all day — just watch! Actually, on second(s) thought, I’ll stop here and not sully hour list any further.

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John Varvatos Conner Racer Leather Jacket

A leather jacket = a wardrobe staple. And I’d love Kris Kringle to bring me this one…or, better yet, bring me this one while wearing it. I mean, the red-and-white suit is classic, but I kinda think Santa deserves a Leather Daddy moment.

Ralph Lauren Alpine Suede Trail Boots

I think a pair of boots like this is great, because they’re durable and sturdy and perfect for a romantic snowy stroll in nature with your boo, or for cutting down next year’s Christmas tree. And the year after that, and the year after that…

Johnstons of Elgin Ribbed Cashmere-Blend Socks

The maker of these cashmere socks suggests that these socks only be worn around the house. That’s kind of a flex, not gonna lie — like, these socks are so delicate and comfy, they’re only built to lounge on the couch in front of the glow of the fire (or Netflix) for hours on end. And honestly, relatable. We are all this sock. I want them now.

FOOD AND DRINK

Goldbelly

So, one of the bummers of social media/the internet is seeing and reading about all this delicious food from restaurants all over the world (cool!) only to realize you live a jillion (give or take) miles (kilometers if you prefer) away (not cool!). But Goldbelly packs up provisions from some of the best eateries across the U-S-of-A, packages ‘em in some dry ice and delivers them right to your doorstep (and eventually, your belly). From tamales and Tex-Mex from the Lone Star State, to knishes and cheesecake from New York City, and beyond.

Graza Olive Oil Duo

As David would likely attest (as would any chef, or even at-home chef)…a kitchen without olive oil is like Santa’s sleigh without Rudolph. Or nog without egg. Or Tannen without Baum. Graza’s my fave. This set of two comes with one extra virgin (poor thing) olive oil used for “sizzle” (cooking), and another that’s punchier — made from olives picked earlier in the growing season — and best suited for “drizzle” (topping salads, dips and such).

Beth’s Farm Kitchen Jam Sessions “Merry Winter” Cherry Preserves

David and I are thrilled to collaborate with Beth’s Farm Kitchen to create this jam, made from local New York State sour cherries. I’m super proud of it, and it’s awesome for several reasons: 1) It’s delicious. 2) It’s festive. 3) The jar is dope. It kind of has an Allman Brothers thing going. And finally, 4) proceeds go to City Harvest — an absolutely amazing (and crucial) organization that fights food insecurity here in NYC. They collect leftover food from the city’s restaurants and cafes, and distribute it to help the over one million New Yorkers facing food insecurity, and have been doing so for the last 40 years. And for every jar of Merry Winter Cherry that gets sold, BFK donates $6 to City Harvest, now until January 15.

Mercado Famous Whole Jamon Serrano

Spend any time in Spain and you’ll no doubt see these glorious hocks of ham at eateries, markets and restaurants. And now you can have one in your very own kitchen. This one is a 15-pound, grain-fed, aged-18-months hunk of jamon that’s sure to be the most delicious pork you’ll ever put in your mouth. Mmmm. No one is toppin’ my tapas party. ¡Digame, Papá Noel, por favor!

Ron Harris’s (aka My Dad’s) Cutting Boards

My dad, in addition to being a morally just New Mexico attorney, also likes working with wood. Like father, like son AMIRITE? Sorry, Dad. But his hobbying has created some wonderful gifts to yours truly: a hand-turned fountain pen, a Series of Unfortunate Events-inspired magnifying glass, and as of late, he’s been creating one-of-a-kind, super awesome cutting boards. They’re intricate, like optical illusions, and I’m obsessed. So were the judges at the New Mexico State Fair, where he won a first place ribbon for his submission this year, thankyouverymuch. One caveat: they aren’t for sale. You can’t purchase them. He’s not all up in Etsy. Ron just makes them out of love, and I love them and I would really love it if I got one this Christmas, you hear me Dad? Also, thank you for inspiring me, Dad.

Thomas Ashbourne After Hours Espresso Martini

Technically it’s not something on my gift wish list, as I’m a part owner in Thomas Ashbourne, and thus get all the freebies I want (nice), but it’s something I just plain want. And love. And hope you will too! The After Hours Espresso Martini, which comes in both bottles and cans, is gluten-free, kosher and expertly crafted with notes of chocolate and vanilla. Drink it straight out of the package, pour it over ice, you do you. Cheers.

SUBSCRIPTION BOXES

Vinebox Holiday Reds Wine Box

And now, let’s talk subscription boxes: the gift that (literally) keeps on giving. (As long as the gift giver keeps paying for it.) Vinebox sends 6 100-ml bottles of wine to your house every month for just $80 a month (and right now, for only for $63!). And just like Wondercade does every week, Vinebox picks a different theme every time. (December’s all about those holiday reds. And I’m not talking Mrs. Claus’s ensemble or her lipstick shades of choice.)

Bespoke Post Monthly Subscription

I adore all things specially sourced, tailor-made, hard to find and timelessly treasured…in short, things that are bespoke. So of course I love Bespoke Post. It’s a subscription box that scours the most unique, special finds from small businesses tailored to you. Take a quiz about what you’re looking for (home decor, men’s clothing for someone with a 32-inch waist, cocktail gear…) and they’ll package up a box of awesome each month. It’s like if Santa worked overtime during the off-season to bring you an ultra-customized mini-haul designed just for you. Don’t you feel special?

The Scotch Malt Whisky Society Subscription

I love whisk(e)y — so much so that I traveled to Scotland last year to sample some of the smokiest, peatiest, tastiest stuff on Earth — and this subscription box, which brings a bit of Islay to your doorstep, falls into “must-have” territory pour moi. It’s not just Scotland, though — this brilliant box gathers the best whiskey from Ireland, Japan, America and beyond, canvassing over 100 distilleries to bring you the best in imbibing.

FOR MY DOGS (ALL FOUR OF ‘EM)

Get Joy Fresh Meal Plan for Dogs

I’m already a devoted customer of this phenomenal brand, founded by my pal Tom Arrix. Back in 2018, when Tom’s golden retriever was diagnosed with lymphoma, he set out to create something better, taking inspiration from holistic human consumption and food science: dog food focused on canine gut health. Eschewing typical kibble, Get Joy’s freeze-dried food — loaded with pre-, pro- and post-biotics — and superfood treats are crafted to optimize your dog’s digestive system and longevity. Need another endorsement? My four four-legged, famously freakin’ finicky critics absolutely devour it.

Roverlund Out-of-Office Pet Carrier

Apropos of nothing, who else remembers “Who Let the Dogs Out”? (Whatever happened to the Baha Men, and did they ever learn who let the pups out? I need a Where Are They Now? special, on both the Men and the dogs.) Anywho, if you have a dog (or cat, or giant ferret, or real-life Pokémon) that’s under 25 pounds and less than 19 inches long and a foot high, put them in (not let them out — see what I did there?) this stylish, airline-compliant carrier that’s ready for cruising altitude, cruising in the car’s backseat…

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